He spent a fortune on filming equipment for her and converting a large room in their Oxfordshire mansion into a cinema so she could show her films. Then when she had ambitions to make a blockbuster, he invested 1.5 million in it. It was (sorry sister) horribly amateur and inevitably a complete flop, but as she was barely 20 at the Will you shut up man glasses American flag shirt besides I will buy this time and had produced a film she found herself on the podium receiving an award for ‘Young Woman of the Year’ alongside the daughter of Al Faed the owner of Harrods at the time and father of Lady Di’s lover. My father’s investments in my sister’s film career have continued but to a far lesser extent as now she finds outside funding and has recently made a film that’s been bought by Netflix. I am pleased to say that it is really very good. I mention this to highlight the extent of a narcissist’s favouritism towards one child in a family. However that can shift as it has done in our case, mainly due to me having had to go to my dad for help because of the diabolical mess I was left in by my ex. I have been extremely honest with him about the abuse (from him too) and my mental state as the result of my ex’s abuse. I don’t think he’ll ever recognise that it was the damage he caused me that left me so vulnerable and led me to an even more abusive relationship. It’s far easier for him to blame my ex than to look at himself, but realising the extent to which I and my kids have suffered has meant he’s softened his stance and he now shows me what seems to be genuine empathy and what’s more he now supports me financially. It’s been recently mooted that I am now his ‘favourite’, but I’m not so sure I like that. However the comparison between our lives is still so stark, it’s laughable. Parcels arrive in their numbers every day at my father’s house, there’s a swimming pool in the massive house, gardeners and cleaners come regularly, the garages are stuffed with classic cars, there’s a nine hole golf course in the garden, a tennis court, a lake and here I am renting a tiny little one bedroomed house that’s falling down and I can just about manage to live on the income he provides!
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Now I am finally recovered, I’d love to be working or to start a business with my craft, but I’d need to rent a shop or buy a shed to work in and that requires money. I have been trying to save, but despite my frugal lifestyle have not saved a penny yet. I’m still usually down to zero by the Will you shut up man glasses American flag shirt besides I will buy this end of each month. But hey ho, at least I do have a roof over my head and I’m happy and healthy and I have the love of my children and grandchildren who are around. That’s all I’ve ever really wanted and it’s enough. Children love their parents unconditionally and are wired to attach to them because their survival is totally dependent upon their parents. This provides the parent with power, control, adoration and admiration, validation, attention and servitude! They can behave without restraint and there is no accountability. Their children cannot leave and will still love them and perceive them as omnipotent! They control every aspect of their children’s lives. No one gets past them to influence, enlighten, support, comfort. indulge, advise or bond with their child. They won’t allow it! They are the sole force in their children’s lives. Having children ensures that their spouses will stay at least until the children are older or the narcissist decides to discard them. It also places them in a virtuous role/position. People admire families, especially those who appear ‘close’. Narcissists are masters at creating appearances. Publicly they get a lot of attention from strangers as well as acquaintances. People compliment what great parents and adorable kids they are. At home the child emotional needs, opinions, requests, preferences and interests are completely disregarded especially when they conflict with their narcissistic parents agenda. Narcissists don’t feel so much as a twinge of guilt in denying their children something of great importance to the child. They are only thinking of what they want and what is best for themselves. Their whole image as a parent and constant flow of narcissistic supply as well as their children’s devotion , admiration, loyalty, and obedience causes them to believe that they love and adore their children. In reality their children are tools. Their hyper focus and vigilant, ‘care’ of their children could be compared to a genie in a lamp…as long as the genie keeps granting your wishes, you are going to take damn good care of that lamp! No one is going to get their hands on your lamp and get benefits from it!